My own "Crown of Thorns"

By Theresa

{my favorite icon: Nymphios which means Bridegroom}

As I was reflecting on my Profession into the Secular Order of the Discalced Carmelites, I was thinking particularly about the name I took when I received the scapular many years ago. I felt inspired to take the name "Theresa of Jesus Crowned with Thorns" since I have a great devotion to this image of Jesus. This image, most of all, pierces my very soul.

I also reflected on how Christ has allowed me to share in this particular suffering during the last 14 years. Through my own depression, anxiety and the chronic insomnia that resulted...Jesus has blessed me with my very own "crown of thorns". This was compounded by the erratic sleep patterns of my youngest daughter and in the last several years, different hours at work that require me to be "on call" through several nights (so I can stay home during the day). Many, many times, it has felt like anything but a "blessing". But it is through this very suffering that God has taught me to rely completely on Him to help me make it through the day...to take care of my family, my home, to work part-time, in other words, to remain faithful to my vocation as wife, mother, and Carmelite.

Please do not get the impression that I did not fail in accepting this suffering. I failed many times...miserably failed...to the point of despair. In the depths of severe sleep deprivation, it is not hard for one to lose all hope and feel as though something will snap inside. There must of been a thread...a thin thread...that kept my soul clinging to God with whatever strength was left. And each time, He pulled me out of the depths of despair. I have lost count...


Continue reading at Theresa's blog my desert heart.

Misery is a choice

By Barbara A. Schoeneberger

Altarpiece of the Seven Joys of Mary (Wikimedia Commons)

Do you know people who are truly miserable? I am not speaking here of that great percentage of the world who live in poverty and disease, in war-torn countries, victims of natural disasters that destroy lives completely, or where people face a choice of convert to this or that religion or die. I am also not speaking of sexually and physically abused children nor of those who have been trafficked for financial gain of others, nor of the many other evils in the world. That temporal misery is forced upon persons by outside powers for evil and selfish purposes. 

I am speaking of misery of heart and soul – an invisible misery that manifests itself outwardly most particularly by sins of the tongue, angry outbursts, rash judgment, destruction of property and/or relationships. The kind of internal churning misery that repels others and perpetuates itself both in oneself and in others in our lives with whom we interact.

We all know the constant complainer, the super-critic who is pleased about nothing, the selfish controller of others who continually resorts to manipulation to get what he or she wants. We all know our share of Chicken Littles for whom the sky is falling almost every day. Their lives are full of constant drama, singularly joyless. And who has not known active alcoholics and others addicts of all types? They live in a continual torment and spinning of fears, often using addiction as a way not to face the demons inside themselves. Maybe, just maybe, we can apply these descriptions to ourselves at one time or another in our lives.


Continue reading at Barb's blog Suffering with Joy.